Christmas Cookies

Christmas Cookie Recipe (follow directions closely)
1 cup of water
1 tsp. baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp. salt
1 cup of brown sugar
2 tsp. lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup nuts
2 cups of dried fruit
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila
Sample the Cuervo to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the
Cuervo again, to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and
drink. Turn on the electric mixer... Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add one teaspoon of sugar... Beat again. At this point it's best to make
sure the Cuervo is still OK, try another cup ... just in case.
Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck
in the cup of dried fruit. Pick the frigging fruit off floor...
Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just
pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.
Next, sift two cups of salt, or something. Who giveshz a sheet. Check the
Jose Cuervo. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.
Greash the oven.
Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to
beat off the turner. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish
the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.
CHERRY MISTMAS